Disclaimer: Iām aromantic, so Iām using āsignificant otherā to generically mean āthe person/people in my life who I would expect to show me the highest level of support.ā Also, Iām not the best marketer, but Iām great at having strife-free relationships, so my perspective might not be too helpful if maximizing profits is your bigger goal.
Overall, I donāt want or expect a seller/customer relationship with my significant others. My fans should pay me; my significant others should be there for me in other ways (like listening to me complain about my Patreon, lol XD). They can pledge, but I donāt want them to feel they owe it to me, and I wouldnāt want their pledge status to affect our relationship.
Iāve never asked a significant other to pledge to me. My two closest people did voluntarily, over time - one on Patreon and one elsewhere because they didnāt want to pledge on Patreon. A key reason they pledged was because they were also legitimate fans of the work I was creating, so they saw all the same content and communications I sent to any of my other readers, including my explanations of why Patreon is important to me.
Before they pledged, I occasionally shared limited Patreon content with them whenever I was excited to show them something. I only gave what I genuinely wanted to give, with no strings attached or expectations of reciprocation.
There are other people in my life who are important to me but who arenāt involved in my creative endeavors and donāt pledge to my Patreon, and Iām fine with that too. If they donāt consume my work, I donāt expect them to pledge.
If I were to hypothetically imagine being on the flip side, Iād feel uncomfortable if someone I was dating asked or expected me to subscribe to a paid service of theirs. Itād feel like an obligation. Whether Iād feel inclined to subscribe on my own depends entirely on our relationship and whether I was also a consumer of their work.
